30 years abroad that’s a long time living away from home. To call Trista a “serial expater” would be inaccurate. Trista’s life has been so much more than that. Over the last 30 years, she has traveled the world and lived in some of the most hostile countries in the world to work as a Humanitarian Aid Worker. What is life like, living in so many different countries? And how do you deal with working in challenging and complex environments? Today, Trista shares the incredible and inspiring journey that led to her leading a life abroad for over 30 years.
Hey Trista, 30 years abroad, what an incredible journey that must be. But let’s start at the beginning. Do you remember how and why you decided to move overseas nearly 30 years ago?
I began traveling when I graduated from high school at 19 years old, heading to Europe for several months to travel around. I think I visited 14 countries during that trip. I had such a good time, and I wasn’t ready to start university, so I applied for a one-year work visa for Australia.
I worked a few months at home to save up plane fare and then took off, working as a waitress and Au Pair in Sydney before traveling around the country for a month.
After that, I enrolled in university and obtained my degree in Political Studies. Once I graduated, I took off again, this time to South Korea to teach English, and I just kept going. I did return home to pursue my Master’s degree in International Development and have spent some downtime at home over the years, but I’ve basically been coming and going since I was 19, so 30 years now.
I chose a career in Humanitarian Aid to combine my interest in international politics, travel and have an opportunity to serve populations in need. Since then, I’ve worked in Angola, Kosovo, Sri Lanka, the U.S., Yemen, Iraq (twice), and Lebanon.
How has your life looked like for the past 30 years? Can you tell me a bit about your journey living abroad?
It’s been a lot of packing and moving around! I’ve lost track of how many coffee makers, weight sets, and TVs I’ve bought for my various homes around the globe. Sometimes, I’ve made decisions to travel and live in certain places. Other times I’ve landed up in a place because I’ve been offered a job there.
I try not to get too attached to where I want to go or land up. I’ve had some amazing experiences and met some truly kind and generous people. I’ve rescued a few animals as well. Typically when I finish a contract, I will do a bit of traveling and spend some time at home with family and friends, which is nice.
I struggled for the first several years with my decision to pursue an international career. I was not sure if it was a mistake to live away from home, away from family and friends, and that I should pursue a more traditional lifestyle.
I actually did move back to Toronto for a year in between Sri Lanka and Iraq and worked for a Canadian NGO, which had me traveling for short visits to Haiti, Uganda, and Ghana, but I didn’t enjoy it all. However, I’m glad I tried it because after that time at home I was more comfortable with my decision to live abroad and I’ve certainly enjoyed it more since then.
Living abroad most of your life, how has that shaped your relationships with family and friends back home? Over the last 30 years, technology has made communication a lot easier. Has that impacted your relationships as well?
Indeed, technology has made keeping in touch so much easier! I remember being in Australia in 1992 and waiting for letters to arrive from home. When I was in Angola in 2003, we lived out in the bush and only had a satellite phone for communication – no mobile phones, no email, nothing (we also were without electricity and running water!). Now having video calls over Zoom and FaceTime makes all the difference.
For a number of years, I had a long-distance relationship, and I know we wouldn’t have lasted as long as we did if it weren’t for Skype. Now I mainly FaceTime my parents weekly and occasionally with my brother, sister-in-law, and nephew. I was calling friends at home more often during COVID lockdowns, but there are really only a few friends I would call regularly.
Everyone else gets an email. I have a group of friends that I’ve kept in touch with since high school and university, and they understand my comings and goings, and I make a point of letting them know when I’ll be back in town so we can catch up.
You are finishing your contract as a humanitarian aid worker soon. How did you become a UN volunteer?
I first did an internship with a Canadian NGO in Central America back in 1998/99. Then after completing my Master’s degree in International Development, I became a UN Volunteer in Angola in 2003, and I’ve continued ever since.
Working in (often) inhospitable and unsafe environments and dedicating your life to help and save others, how did you deal with that mentally? What were the emotions that you dealt with often (and how did you deal with them)?
It’s definitely been challenging. I’ve learned to prioritize taking care of myself – that includes yoga, meditation, running, journaling, reading, and taking time to watch a good movie or speak to friends/family at home. There has to be a balance, and I have to be able to recharge.
It’s also been important to take breaks outside of the country I’m working in and have vacation time to rest. Typically I only return home twice a year, and the rest of the time, I’ll spend time in places where I can relax and recharge.
In the past, it’s been easy for me to feel overwhelmed and stressed because of the pressure of a demanding workload, volatile and complex environments, and challenging living conditions.
I started working with a life coach in 2018, and that has been extremely helpful in managing my mindset and emotions. However, I wish I had had some of the tools and skills I acquired years ago. I found life coaching so helpful and empowering that last year, I decided to become a life coach myself to help women in similar positions.
Having lived in so many places all over the world, how do you create a sense of home? Do you bring specific belongings with you to make you feel at home? Or are there other ways that made you feel comfortable in a foreign country?
Typically when I leave for a new job, I will be sure to bring some photos of friends and family, a couple of nice candles, my yoga mat, my favorite products such as a cleanser, hand cream, and shampoo. In addition, I make sure I have several bags of my favorite coffee, and of course, being Canadian, I will bring some Hudson Bay tea towels and a bottle of maple syrup!
Otherwise, once in a new place, I will buy myself a good coffee maker, an exercise bike, and maybe some nice area rugs and wine glasses.
How do you prepare for each move abroad? Are there specific steps you always take? And has that changed over the years?
I used to spend a lot of time choosing the books I would take with me to read! It was always a dilemma as to how much space they would take and how much they weighed. Now with my iPad, I can access new books whenever I want. That has truly changed my life.
Otherwise, I’m not sure I’ve improved much in the packing department over the years. I still always feel like I’m taking too much and that it’s the wrong stuff!
I’ve always taken many of my favorite beauty products and food items, but I’ve tried to reduce that over the past few years and try to make do without.
What are your tips for settling in a new country? Are there certain things you always do?
I try to unpack as quickly as possible and get myself organized and settled into my new space.
I will do some grocery shopping and make sure that I know where to find the basics, check out what’s available and make sure that my new place has all the necessary items I want.
I feel like the quicker I can get my new place sorted and organized, the more comfortable and at ease it makes me feel.
What are the craziest or most awkward situations that you experienced while living abroad?
While in Aden, Yemen, someone started a fire outside our office to burn some garbage. However, the fire spread to some nearby scrub and a palm tree, which also caught fire. We called the fire department, but they told us that it was lunchtime and they couldn’t come and besides they didn’t have any water to use and they wouldn’t come even if they wanted to…… we were left to put out the fire ourselves with our small extinguishers! It took a bit of work, but we were able to put it out without any damage to our office, but I’m sorry to say the palm tree sustained heavy damage.
We spoke earlier about your relationships back home, but how have you created and maintained (new) friendships while living abroad? And how are these relationships different from the ones back home?
I’ve met some amazing people during my time abroad. Some I still keep in touch with, others were only in my life for a brief period of time, and then we’ve moved on. However, there are several people that I still miss whom I worked with, and they are now scattered across the globe. People get busy with new jobs, travel, families, so I do what I can to stay in touch, but I try not to stress too much about it or take it personally when I lose touch with someone.
I’ve also had many friendships with people because of the time and place we find ourselves in. Often we find ourselves spending time with people because they are available. I’ve learned to enjoy myself regardless and be grateful to have some company, and if I don’t want to spend time with someone, I no longer feel like I should and would rather spend time by myself. I’ve come to enjoy my own company. I believe the most important relationship we can have is with ourselves, and certainly, my life abroad has given me plenty of opportunities to develop that relationship.
Looking back on the last 30 years, how has living abroad changed you?
One of the most obvious ways it has changed me is that I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to return home to live full-time again. I’ve thought about it from time to time, but then I think of all the wonderful places there are to go, and I know I’m going to keep going. Canada is great, and of course, it’s nice to be around family and friends, but the pull to travel is still too strong.
Otherwise, I like to think living abroad for so long has made me more of who I am. I like to think that all of my travels have helped to amplify my sense of adventure. I’ve become more resilient and courageous. I’ve developed a sense of appreciation for the world and how unique and privileged I am to have had the experiences I’ve had, and I look forward to many more. I hope to inspire more women to do the same and support them throughout their journeys because the opportunity to make our lives so much bigger shouldn’t be missed.
Having lived abroad for all those years, I feel like the word “Expat” is not really the right word to describe you. So, how would you describe yourself?
That’s a good question! Maybe I’m a type of global nomad.
Last but certainly not least, what is your advice for people out there who are thinking of moving abroad?
Do it! Travel and living abroad makes your life so much richer. It comes with its own set of challenges for sure, but there is nothing more exhilarating and empowering. It will awaken all of your senses and give you such a sense of freedom and adventure. Nothing can beat it for me.
Want to have a chat with Trista or maybe book a personal coaching session with her? Please go check out her website: www.tristaguertin.com.
Feel inspired by Trista’s story but unsure where to start? Take your dream and turn it into a reality with the Let’s Move Abroad book.
